Sometimes It Sneaks Up On You ...

Last fall my son moved from the burrow to the dorm - it's only 20 minutes from the house, and I knew he would be returning to the burrow for some weekends, holidays, breaks. But at Christmas he moved from the burrow to his father's condo which is a stone's throw from the university. This move felt different. Now I doubt he'll be coming back to the burrow to live for breaks, holidays, etc. In a way it's sad. In another way it's just very strange. And the realization of this change kinda snuck up on me. There was no fanfare - no day that it suddenly happened - it was a gradual thing and it's taken a while for me to realize it.

As much as I have complained about how sloppy he is and how much I enjoy coming home to a clean and tidy burrow, it is a very weird feeling to know I'm the only one in the burrow (well, except for the critters). Last night after cleaning up the supper dishes I was just chilling on the sofa looking through a catalog when the quietness hit me - it made me feel very small and almost unimportant.

Things are working out very well for him, though, and that makes me happy.

You know, our kids sometimes do things to make us proud even when they don't realize it. Like the day 4 years ago when I was cleaning up my son's filthy dirty bedroom and came across a stack of magazines ... hidden under a bed ... and my heart just sank through my toes. So I slowly and carefully pulled the stack of magazines out and let out such a loud sigh of relief when I saw they were hunting magazines! I was so proud of him at that moment, or maybe I was just so relieved that I mistook the feeling of relief as that of feeling proud.

But he does make me proud. He has a great sense of humor. He's taking college seriously and his grades prove it. He sensible (about most things). He's a fun person to be with. He's a good friend to his friends. He's still a slob though but if my brain cells will let me remember correctly, I was also a slob at that age ...